Ayo whattup you back in the presence of the almighty Galaxy Knuckles aka the illustrious Phantom Raviolis or the grand imperial Cocaine Biceps live in the flesh namsayin. You might also kno the god as the immortal divine Spartacus Deluxe aka Shampoo Bracelets the panty melter aka the mighty Hands Of Zeus aka the infinite powerful Thor Molecules n better known to yall as the world famous Big Ghost. Peace to the okayplayer family for bringin the god back like Jordan IIIs. But yo...once again yall gotta heed these legal shits first…
Disclaimer:
The views n what have you in this muthafucka is all my owns…so that aint in no way a reflection of nobody other than myself n whatever else b. No other man or woman or child represented heretofore n such hereby is sharin the opinion of the gentleman who be sayin the shit contained within namsayin. This muthafucka do be containin foul language n shit that might offend small children n old people n shit too. It should be noted by all those who is present today here today before God that yall here on ya own accord n if anybody not cool wit that they should leave now or forever hold they peace...
n now without no further shit ado lets see whether or not the white boy still got it….
Ayo I be rootin for Justin namsayin. I was happy to hear that son was comin back after it had been announced a few months ago outta the blue n shit nahmean. He been missin from the scene for SEVEN years b.... Son even let another Justin come thru n scoop up his mononym n shit. I mean who takes 7 years off yo? Thats how much time Dre took off between The Chronic n the 2001 joint. Like who else besides Dre would do some shit like that tho son? Thats damn near offensive. Thing is when Dre came back a lot of muthafuckas was shocked that son had actually delivered another classic. Not that Im tryin to compare one of the founding members of NWA to a dude who got his start on the Mickey Mouse Club n was in a boy band wit the announcer from Family Feud, a closet homosexual (nothin against gay folk), a grown man who still goes by the name "JC" n probably the most douchebag lookin douchebag to ever walk the planet aka this muthafucka...
Son looked like the poster child for serial date rape n shit...I actually no joke wanna take a butter knife n stab this muthafucka thru his eyes n shit b...but thats a whole nother story yo. So lets get into this shit...
1. "Pusher Love Girl" - I mean...the shit is cool. Like in a interlude from a late 90s Prince cover band album that got looped 8 times n shit type way. There aint no reason on Gods green earth why this joint needs to be this fuckin long tho namsayin. Kno how much shit I coulda been done before this song wrapped? I coulda painted a bedroom n still had time to imagine crane kickin Tyga in the throat (Fuck you Tyga) from the time I had pressed play on this shit to when it was over. Aint like the song is wack but it dont JUSTIFY this length at all n shit.
2. "Suit & Tie" feat. Jay-Z - Man this shit toooooo elegant. I still dont get why muthafuckas was on some disappointed shit after this dropped. Yeah yeah yeah I get it...it aint exactly Cry Me A River or SexyBack but shit still serves its purpose n what have you nahmean. You really gotta listen to this shit on some decent speakers tho cuz it wont sound dope playin on ya iphones off youtube n shit like that namsayin. So much finesse. This shit be sparklin on some Superfly shit ike Curtis Mayfield blessed this joint hisself... N**gas got xylophones n harps n shit cascadin across this muthafucka. Hov aint exactly bring that Crazy In Love type fire but he aint exactly sleepwalk thru the shit neither. I mean aint like son was pose to body the muthafucka on some Resevoir Dogs shit...its a classy affair yo. Grow up b. N**gas got on bow ties n aint een sellin bean pies n definitely aint tryin to wish death on blue eyed devils on this record namsayin. Shit is for n**gas wit concierges.
3. "Don't Hold The Wall" - Not gon lie yo...this shit boring as fuck. On a scale of 1 to Sideline Story on the boredom scale this shit was venturin deep as fuck into the sleepiest abysses of Cole World territory nahmean. Jermaine Cole hisself probably got all types of hype to this joint like the HOT NOW light jus came on at Krispy Kremes n shit. Shit only came alive like 5 minutes in when the beat had switched up n shit. Thats a hell of a time investment tho my n**ga.
Of course Timbo husky ass all over this joint remindin you who produced the track. Its like SON...take a muthafuckin break from tryin to turn all these shits into duets yo! "Da-da-dance...dont dont hol the wohl...." Im sayin chill you ol pack of hot dogs neck havin was-fat-then-got-swole-then-got-fat-again attention seekin ass muthafucka... Its all love tho.
>>>Purchase The 20/20 Experience (via iTunes)
4. "Strawberry Bubblegum" - This beat be soundin like some shit Drake would get his little 'hey gurl you aint gotta try to impress me to impress me awwwwww' basic bitch mind manipulation on to. But I actually fucks wit it. T-Minus shoulda at least gotta shout out on the track for inspirin the fuck out of it. Yo but wait....oh shit...real real big surprise rite hea son....this shit is TWO songs in ONE. Oh WOW! WOOOOOOOOW... So stead a bein jussa dope little 4 min track the shit clocks in at 3 hours again? DOPE!
We a group JT...you n me baby...
5. "Tunnel Vision" - Man....Timbaland really dont be shuttin the fuck up at all yo. After a couple minutes this shit be havin like 7 million sounds happenin at the same time too son. Its like when ya computer restarts n you had a couple youtube videos open n the shit is all playin at the same time n whatever. Muthafuckas is beatboxin again on this shit too. White folk really love beatboxin tho...
6. "Spaceship Coupe" - This shit for the grown n sexy right here. Sounds almost like some Jodeci The Show The Afterparty The Hotel type shit...minus that K-Ci & Jo-Jo vocal yin n yang magic. Whoever wrote the Stylistics "You Are Everything" joint gon want n**gas to cut a check for that lowkey jack on this shit tho.
7. "That Girl" - Shit is aight...this the kinda joint that reminds you how weak sons voice actually is...n at the same time how son really makes the best of that shit. That bein said tho son put his heart into this shit so you gotta respect it. You can also barely hear Timbo on this shit n they kept it under 5 minutes so I kinda fucks wit it.
8. "Let The Groove Get In" - Son jus made a whole song outta the mama-say mama-sah ma-ma-coo-sah part of Wanna Be Startin Somethin... This shit is like 178 minutes longer tho. I hear you ficky ficky ficky'n in the background there too Tim. You need to have a seat bruh. I aint mad at this shit really...but I aint exactly gon be prayin the shit pops up on my shuffle neither.
Seemed like a ok idea at the time n shit...
9. "Mirrors" - The difference between jus singin stupid shit over a groove for a half hour n makin a actual actual song is this shit right here nahmean. This shit is a SONG b. Son SONGED the shit outta this muthafucka too. I aint eem mad at the beatboxin...but the (SURPRISE BITCHES) second half of this shit is another 300 hour coda on some 'you are - you are thuhhh love of-my-life' shit.
Ayo regardless tho...this joint cool even if its some beggin type shit. I guess theres broads out there who like when a dude whine like that n shit but let a cold muthafucka like Prince sing this shit n that beggy shit gon be out..the beggin gon be replaced by some commands n shit. That n**ga dont beg a broad for a damn thing namsayin. But thats irrelevant.
10. "Blue Ocean Floor" - SON....the fuck is this? Shit sounds like the soundtrack to dolphins givin birth in a lagoon n shit. This like some shit Wiz Khalifa do kegels in his warm soymilk baths to. You can almost see the winged dicks that swooped down from the sky to help son achieve this level of bitchifiedness. This some shit for n**gas who lay on blankets in the park n caress the grass n stare at the clouds n shit. This for n**gas who be gettin mad upset if you say some foul shit bout Beyonce namsayin. Top it all off its another joint that never ends...I had two naps in the middle of listenin to this muthafucka yo. Fuck outta here man...Unless you like marinatin ya vagina in yogurt to keep it soft there aint shit here for you b.
>>>Purchase The 20/20 Experience (via iTunes)
Bonus Tracks:
11. "Dress On" - Man...Timbaland still spillin his vocal struggle sauce on joints even if he aint produce the joint...son beatboxin on this shit again too. This is lyrically some stupid shit b. Like on the level of R Kelly at his worst type lyrics. Beat is aight tho. Overall the song is cool but these lyrics is trash.
Son jus let me hop on 5 more joints...
12. "Body Count" - This joint was produced by JT n Rob Knox like the last joint... n Timbo still not chillin. This muthafucka actually sound like some shit Pharrell hooked up tho...in 2002. Shit jus gets confusin. I aint really fuckin wit this at all. Justin...if n**gas want ya old shit they gon buy ya old albums aight.
In the end this shit aint horrible. Definitely not gon get the no skips treatment on most gadgets...matter fact its a whole lot of skippable moments on this muthafucka b. That two songs in one gimmick gets tired too yo. You kinda gotta do that shit in moderation fam. Timbaland should kno that shit. After Jay asked him to flip two beats on one track for 'Come N Get Me' Hov aint do that shit again (A Million And One ?'s/Rhyme No More dont count cuz the shit had two song titles) he aint really do that again until Watch The Throne. Now we got Kendrick Lamar doin that for half a album n shit so hopefully that shit dont get outta control. Isaac Hayes been did that shit back in the 70s tho. N**gas BEEN had musical sophistication namsayin. JT n Timbo need to stop OD'n on that n actin like they invented the shit. N**gas dont need 10 minute songs yo. We livin in the era of Recycle Bin Rap (shout out to Tyga) n adult ADD bruh...
Anyways I appreciate the musicianship n whatnot... N**gas aint coast. Only problem is other than on Suit & Tie they aint really come wit nothin new son. I thought n**gas was gon come wit more of that grown shit. Timbo threw together shit that coulda been sittin in his hard drive since the Magoo days for all I kno nahmean. A lotta these joints coulda been leftovers from Justin other albums n shit. But I aint mad. Aint nothin a skip button n a recycle bin (see ya Blue Ocean Floor!) cant fix namsayin. You can hear the Robin Thicke, Frank Ocean n even some Aubrey Graham influences on this shit. In the end tho I cant hate. Son kinda did his thing nlike I said...it wasnt exactly trash. Aight peace.
I gives this shit 3 Zeus Slaps Outta 5
