Photo by Louis Lee. Photo illustration by Kaushik Kalidindi.
Pursuit of Happiness: How Big Hit Overcame Negativity in Prison
Big Hit keeps it real on how he blocked out negativity to pursue his dreams — even while he was in a prison cell.
Big Hit is in the middle of a one-of-a-kind level-up. After multiple stints in prison, he returned home to work with his son, multi-platinum producer Hit-Boy, to launch a rap career. Thus far, the returns have been more than a little promising, with his tracks earning hundreds of thousands of streams and his reputation as a purveyor of reality rap spreading across the West Coast and beyond. Last year, after serving a nine-year prison bid, he consummated his come up with The Truth is in My Eyes, a joint album he released with his son.
Big Hit is living the dream. But before that, he had to survive a nightmare. He served a 13-year prison stint on drug-related charges from 1991 to 2004. He went back a few times after that. While behind bars, he had to find ways to preserve his own mental well-being and look to the future. Speaking to Okayplayer, Big Hit breaks down just how he did itBig Hit: In prison, the negativity is in your face every day. The bullshit never stops. I just isolated myself and tried to control my tongue so I didn't start no more problems. With the issues at hand, I stayed writing and working out to pass the time. I tried to box people out. I was already in a single cell. I wasn't listening to any music, but I was writing music and reading books. I stopped reading the books after a while — I got burned out. My two favorite books were The Bible and the dictionary. When I wasn’t doing that, I was writing down ideas on how to get to the bag — what I was going to do when I got free.
To be a more positive thinker, I look at shit from other people's perspective. Like, “If I was him, how would I react?” I’ve been crossed so many times in my life that I forgive a lot of people. I'm numb at this point. I just deal with it as it comes. As far as my mental health goes, I'm all over the place, but I'm solid. I'm always expecting some bullshit because I know how life is. You never know what to expect. I'm living on the edge. Even a lot of people think I’m rich and it's all gravy. Nah. I'm paying the courts, I'm paying lawyers. It's like oil in my hands. You can't grasp it. I try to carry it accordingly and try to be understanding at the same time. Sometimes I catch myself on the verge of snapping and I try to weigh the options. Then I bounce back to reality; I'm not going to crash out.
To others [who got out of jail], don't let nobody put the battery in your back. Don't react. The next person probably ain't never been through what you've been through. Their consequences are not as deep as what you’re facing. Try to block out the negativity regardless of how the challenges come. Focus on your goals.
